DEAR IMMA AND ABBA

By Malka Turner

ASpecialParent.com

Dear Imma  and Abba,

I just wanted tot ell you how much I appreciate all your efforts to help me grow and learn the Jewish way of life.  But as you know, I can’t speak, so my emotions will have to express themselves as best they can.

You seem to accept Hashem’s will that I be severely handicapped because of a lack of oxygen at birth.  Sometimes I see your tears of sadness, especially when you bensch licht, and whisper a short prayer to the Ribono shel Olam for my refuah shleima.  And even you can’t determine if I see or don’t see.  I can still sense your frustration when you try to get my lips to say a simple ‘Imma’ or ‘Abba’.  I really am trying, but my physical body just won’t let me shape those words yet.

Maybe, some night before you put me in my brace to go to sleep, I’ll be able to sing the Shema with you.  Right now, all I can do is relax my head on your shoulder and listen.

Since I started special school. I’ve come to love Shabbos.  I need a rest, too!  I can tell when Shabbos is coming when Imma is baking challah and the house smells so good.  You know I like Shabbos, because I always eat two bowls of cholent.

Even though you can’t  take me to shul on Shabbos or go to the park (because I can’t walk yet  and there is no eruv), I love going there on the Yomim Tovim.  The most fun is Simchas Torah when Abba holds me up high and dances with me.  Each time I go, I hear more songs, too. (Also, everyone gets to say how beautiful I am…but I should be modest!)

Most people think it takes ‘courage’ to take me out in public, but we know better, don’t we?  I love seeing my Jewish brothers and sisters, even though I can’t be like them.  But then, which two people are alike?  Who know what I am thinking, let aloe what any other ‘normal’ person thinks?  Why should I be deprived of any outside learning experience?

I may never be mainstreamed into a Jewish day school, but I’m glad you’re helping start a special school for Jewish handicapped children.  I’d like the opportunity to be exposed to as much Torah as possible.  I too have a Yiddishe Neshama.  How can anyone know my potential to learn (especially if they don’t try to find out!)?

Imma and Abba, don’t give up on me!  You’re doing just what I need for now, even if the road is full of rocks (sometime boulders).  But you’re hurdling over those obstacles, and we’re all getting somewhere.  It may just take a little longer that with other children, but what is time when Moshiach is near?

I can’t kiss you back (I owe you thousands), but I do love you very much.

Esther Tehela